party puffs?

I went to my friend Patrick's party last night. I got all excited when I walked in (because of course my eyes went DIRECTLY to the food table) and I saw what appeared to be a big bowl of CHEESE PUFFS!!

CHEESE PUFFS.
AT.A.PARTY.

I was in disbelief and ECSTATIC! not so much because I wanted to EAT cheespuffs right then, but more because I thought FINALLY it's acceptable again to have a bowl of cheese puffs for party food! FINALLY it's not just ME who would WANT that! AND to add to my glee, THIS friend is a healthy gym rat gay dude with healthy pretty West Hollywood gaybors...so if it's acceptable HERE, then MAN imagine what might pop up at a straight party!? bowls of fritos and bean dip in a can? deviled eggs? rice krispy treats? cheeze whiz? chicken-in-a-biskits with Lipton's onion dip?? little weinies on toothpicks?

no more wheat crackers and Carr's pepper bakes!! No more veggie platter! No more gourmet lame olives stuffed with weird stuff....CHEETOS BOWLS are back! And if they're back with the uber-gays...then bust out the hoho's as dessert!! "MAN"! I thought "I'm throwin a party!!"

I was so SO awash with relaxation and amazement. This was the beginning of a new/old era!

Then I floated over to the table itself and as I got closer my dreams started crashing...It was a big bowl of...of...of....CARROT STICKS!!!

WAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAH!

THAT party? sucked! stupid gays. and their fucking carrot sticks!