Hostess with the Mostest

This is just one of those mornings where I woke up craving stuff. If I didn't have Tunde in 3 hours I might have caved. AND while watching FOX news there was a commercial for pizza rolls! AND then following that was one for pillsbury toaster streudels, where they pull it apart and the frosting melts with the strawberry filling...

TORTURE! IT couldn't have been worse unless it followed with a hostess commercial. hey, why aren't there any hostess commercials? Have they been banned? Like, they're SO bad for you there has been an ordinance to not show them on TV like cigarettes? And what ever happened to Dolly madison? I think my next pet will be named dolly madison. La La La.

I bet Suze Ormon would yell at me for eating hostess stuff. (TUNDE: I did NOT eat any ding dongs this week. I was just SAYING that Suze Ormon would yell at me, like IF I ate them how I USED to. past Tense. It was a JOKE)

When I was about 6, My grandma Nita and I saved Knudsen Yogurt tops for tickets to the circus in San Diego. She would bundle them together with rubber bands in packs of ten. We ate a LOT of yogurt. I forget how many we needed, but we made the quota and she got two tickets to the circus, AND two train tickets to get down there. I had NEVER been on a train. It was probably the most exciting trip I ever took. When we were on the train she handed me a little backpack FILLED with cracker jacks, Tab soda, and gulp, THREE packets of hostess donuts. Chocolate. Powdered. Crumb. I was beside myself. (My mom would NEVER buy those. they were forbidden. Our 'sugar' 'treat' was raisin bran IF she was feeling jovial. I used to get to the box first and dump it out and take out ALL the sugar coated raisins, all but like 10. Then I would eat them in one bowl and by the time Craig got to the box, I would be all "wow...not too many raisins in there, huh!)

SO, anyway, My grandma said I could eat ONE packet now, and then save the rest for the circus. I don't even remember the stupid circus. I just remember that backpack sitting on my lap, counting the second until I could eat my donuts.

It started early, those addictions. Our parents' attempts to keep us off sugar just eventually backfired. By the time I got to college I went hostess Crazy. My roommate And I discovered the HOSTESS OUTLET. I bought in bulk. Raisin bran gave way to A LOT of captain crunch and lucky charms (mmmmm Lucky charms!!)

Ah, those were the days. The good ole days 'o plenty.