Sunday, January 03, 2010

Keeping Psychiatrists in business since 1965

"did you ever think that there's more to life than being really really really really really really ridiculously good looking?"

I taught GENTLE yoga this morning. And this big guy came in with some serious bling.

ANYWAY. He had a HUGE gold chain on. Annnnnd, we did this thing where you lie on your back on a block so your head tilts back a lot. His gold necklace kept sliding up his neck, choking him. Did he take it off? no way. This other time a woman came in with a ROCK on her finger. And she kept gauging herself with it. Why am I telling you this? Cuz it makes me laugh. People are so stupid.

And on that note, I am still recovering from the cuckoo's nest Christmas with my family. You have to understand something. GETTING to my dad's house in N. CA takes LONGER than if I flew to Paris. Talk about trains planes and automobiles! And on part of the FOUR HOUR drive, AFTER the flight, is the windiest road in the history of all windy roads! These roads go through thick redwood (or whatever big trees are) forest where there is no light or living beings or starbucks for MILES. When you do finally break through the Hobbit forest and see the ocean and light of day, you're so sick and disoriented you can't even appreciate it.

Add to that a day of eating nothing but cheese and butter brickle and it's no wonder the fam turns feral.

The best part of going home for Christmas though? ASIDE from being able to observe the mental patients otherwise known as my relatives?

Going through the family album. So I can, here on this blog and forever more emblazoned on the internet, post the very pics that represent who we are.

I could really rock the plaid as a kid. Seriously. Stylin.

This is my older brother, Andre the Giant, with the best wedgie EVER. Jack Tripper would be proud.

This is my dad. Who clearly didn't get the memo about not wearing your cub scout shorts past the age of 11.

This is my older bro, younger bro, and younger sis. But that's no matter. The point is, check out that two toned blue shag carpeting and faux wood paneling ON THE CEILING. That there was our prize van. It had a bean bag too. And that couch pulled out into a bed. Don't be mad that we were so VERY ahead of that Partridge bus.

(what is WITH my bro and the shorty shorts? Is he even WEARING pants?)

Me (plaid jumpsuit!) with my baby bro...awww.

Annnnd this is my stylin' bro with my baby sis.

So, see? it's no WONDER most of us need meds now. And this is only HALF my family. Some people have skeletons in their closet? I got these guys. And you wonder why I'm still single?


Kristina P. said...

I wish my family was as lame, I mean, cool, as yours.

DG at Diary of a Mad Bathroom said...

This was like walking through the Sears catalog circa 1969.

Sara @ Domestically Challenged said...

Okay. Everything i was going to say flew out the window seeing those pics.

bernthis said...

Wow, I think the photo of your dad in his shorts is truly something i could have lived without. REally, no, I mean it.

Lin said...

LOVE the photos!! Those are HILARIOUS! I'm not sure what is more disturbing about the brother shot--his wedgie, the jacket with the shorts combo, or the giant knee-hi's from hell. Nice.

peewee said...

LIN! I KNOW!!! I can't stop laughing myself. He is going to KILL me when he sees that I posted this!

Carin said...

You look so cute!!!!!!!!
I want the polka-dot wallpaper behind you in that first picture!!!!!!!!

p.s. if you think those pictures are will NEVER have the "Miller Family" photo albums in your possession! Our wood paneling was in our trailer...that we lived in!

erin0703 said...

all of the comments i would like to post will get me into trouble with one (or all) of the family members. so i'll just say this. the cheese and brittle day was a keeper. mmm.

Debbie said...

You crack me up. Especially the wedgie photo! And yes, the guy in the gym would have made me laugh too.

kys said...

Seeing those pics makes me so mad at my mother. She has destroyed or given my brother (same dif.) most of our old family photos.

PS Niiiiice van. My apt. in college had the same ceiling.

Kristin said...

Dude. Your bro's headband is wicked hot!

dede said...

ahhh - thanks for the laugh! I am glad Craig balanced out his shorts with those socks, almost like wearing capris!

Lady of Perpetual Chaos said...

Hmmm...I think I want to come to your next holiday celebration. I'll bring chocolates.