Summa summa summa-time

I can't even BUH-lieve it's almost July!! I was in Nordstrom yesterday (everyday) and they had FALL STUFF out! Which thrills me to no end as that is my MOST favorite clothing season. I am SO getting these....

And when I say "getting these" what I mean is that I want these for my Birthday....soooooo.....

Also, I've been somewhat Vegan now for like a MONTH. Maybe even more. It's the gateway drug to this...

LUCKILY the fine people from Europe FINALLY brought these to the US....

Seriously. If you have not even had a Magnum bar then just don't start. Annnnnd I ate a whole box yesterday. Which isn't very vegan of me. When I have ever gone to another Country I GORGE on these. Obsessed. Which is good, because now that they're in the US, these alone will keep me from ever being 100% vegan and therefore I will remain hated by all Outback Drivers and Tom's shoes wearers. 

Subject changer...I also saw this at the grocery check-out yesterday...

And I thought, huh....I wonder if Italians are BEYOND insulted by this! Like, THIS is what Italy has to offer??? THIS is a gift of Italy?? 

Just typing all this made me hungry...gonna go eat more magnum bars make my vegan smoothie

One of THOSE People

Yah. I've done IT. Crossed over into Crazy Town aka Whole Foods Shopper. I'm a vegan now. Well. that's not entirely true. I'm a sometimes fair weathered vegan...MEANING if you are visiting me from out of town (OR down the block) we ARE going to cheesecake factory. 

But in my everyday life at home I am attempting to eliminate all animal products. Yes. Even cheese :(  (unless you're coming over for a wine and cheese party)(anyone? anyone?) And I'm only telling YOU guys this because my audience is judgy free! HA!

 AHHAHAHAHAHHAHAH!

The PROBLEM with this lifestyle is that ONE...It means I have to go to Whole foods WAY more than ever. I try to limit it to once a week. And I am learning more and more about their uh, clientele, as it were. I haven't stumbled upon more busy body proselytizers  IN MY LIFE. And I've BEEN to Bible camp AND lived in Utah! I am not even kidding when I tell you that at LEAST once per trip SOMEone has come up to tell me about what product to buy....and we aren't talking about employees here. CUSTOMERS. I'll be looking at the ingredient list on something and sure enough I hear "Oh..have you TRIED that one yet? Because you have GOT to try the raw organic chia seeds...what you have there? those are just plain raw! Blyackkkk!"

The OTHER problem is that I get kinda spacey and light headed sometimes. I don't know if it's my body weeding out toxins OR screaming for a slab of Brie.

I consider myself blameless here. It's NOT MY FAULT! It all started with this stupid movie and then from that movie I read this stupid book. And now I am hooked. And people say media doesn't affect us! Please God...PLEASE...SOMEONE make a movie about the benefit of Oreos! 

This has surprisingly been pretty easy. I mean I was almost kinda sorta vegetarian before (except for that honey baked ham my brother made at easter) (the one I said I wouldn't touch)(and then ate half of it) (to his chagrin because there went the leftovers for ham sandwiches!) But yah. So. It HAS been easy and actually kinda fun. I know. 

You're shaking your head. 

Deleting me from your RSS feed.

I don't blame you. But just know that mommy and cheese still love each other and we will NEVER stop loving YOU.

procrastinators r us

Seriously. I am the worlds biggest procrastinator. I am procrastinating so hard that I'm BLOGGING! And this, AFTER I already tidied up the house, cleaned the counter tops (I don't clean) and took out the recycle bin! (I have never done this) I have lots to do....they just are THAT unappealing apparently that I refuse to do them. SO here I sit. Writing and watching Sex and the City reruns and playing Words with Friends and now even the new "Hanging with Friends" (hurry...GET THIS ONE so we can play!)

It's a good thing I own my new (non) business. Otherwise I'd SO be fired!

Pooped Friday

I am exhausted. NOT from all the spinning and walking and general exercise I've been doing the last few months. No. I am pooped because PEOPLE KEEP WEARING PATCHOULI TO SPIN CLASS!!! WHY???? That smell makes me want to die. Its worse than a fart. And it sucks my energy into its nasty vapors. I always try to find the culprit so I can yell at them or spit on them or SOMETHING like I would normally have done pre-personality rehab. But it makes me all dizzy and confused and I feel like PeeWee Herman when he lost his bike and was all wandering around thinking that EVERYONE stole it...

I'm not making sense am I? yah. It's the patchouli fumes. And all the workouts.

But all I have to say is...I've missed you guys SO much! That's the only reason I'm back here, bitching again. Because my life has been lonely and empty without all your funny banter and comments.  And who else will listen to my Fabio sightings and how I ate lunch RIGHT next to heidi montag last week?

Or how I walk by this sign everyday...

and up until just a few days ago thought it was saying "421 brunches for u" and I was all "wow! The banks are giving away brunches now? cool!"

Or look at gratuitous pics of the cutest baby niece ever...

or look at even more pics of the cutest DOG ever!

And WHO else would I share my underwear hoarding problem with??

(I counted 102 pairs....74 brand new) (I guess they didn't really cover this at personality rehab)

SO THANK GOD for you guys!

Is it time for cousin Oliver to go home?

My poor sad neglected blog....do I keep writing on this dinosaur or have we already jumped the shark??