Friday, August 14, 2009

Pampers Pants...or Pamps

I was gonna write a post about Nutella and how I just saw a commercial for it used as a nutritional breakfast food because, and I quote...

..."Nutella is FILLED with wholesome ingredients like hazelnuts, skim milk, and real cocoa! (they left out the FIRST 2 ingredients, healthy sugar and Hydrogenated Palm Oil) AND I put it on whole wheat toast for a nutritious breakfast! AND as A mother I feel good about it!"

But I'll keep it simple because IT IS THE WORST FOOD OUT THERE and I LOVE IT. And If I love it, your kids should NOT be eating it.

THEN an ad from THIS NEW product landed in my email box and ooohhhh boy! I couldn't let you move on to your weekend without the new....




...PRANCING LEOPARD PANTSUIT! You sexy kitten you! Meeeeeoow! Who needs a widdle witter box when you can just poop right in your widdle onesie!
You don't like a jumpsuit style? Don't worry! They have poop-in-your-pants PANTS too! They're called the "Harlem Pant" cuz you know, for people who like to JUMP AROUND. JUMP AROUND. JUMP UP JUMP UP AND GIT DOWN.



And to GO WITH your Harlem Hot Pants....AWESOME SOCKS so that you can wear socks with your flip flops! Or even your new bandals! PHEW! As a yoga teacher my feet get WAY cold when I wear flip flops and FINALLY they have created socks for ME!


And for those rare days when I get sick of flip flops, they have created these...

These will for SURE stay clean and you won't trip over those ties AT ALL! But having elfin-like feet with the "dumper jumper" will be HOTT!! Yah, that's right. DOUBLE TT HOT!**

**You need to put your orders in NOW so that when I host the Blogger Yoga retreat (which I really am gonna do soon....dates will be discussed later) you will be prepared to show up decked out and ready to rumble in the desert jungle!

17 comments:

dede said...

I have been thinking of you every time I see the nutella you left for me. If it wasn't for you, I could have turned 40 without ever trying it! thanks. That pantsuit thing could come in handy if you were really bloated or if you wanted to sneak an old fashioned buttermilk bar into yoga class!

peewee said...

...or even a dozen buttermilk bars!

Kelli said...

Mmmmmm, nutella! I just accept it for what it is and smear it on a croissant. Delish! Add my Starbucks and I'm sure I hit 1,000 calories before noon.

Kristina P. said...

I saw that same commercial, and immediately hated my mother for not feeding me some delicious, healthy Nutella when I was a child. It's just like spinach.

And I hate yoga, but I would love it if I could wear a yoga diaper.

Dee at Pedestrian Palate said...

No risk of cameltoe in that faboo onesie. . .

peewee said...

elephant toe more like it

Sara @ Domestically Challenged said...

Mmm...Nutella. As much as I appreciate it? My kids have never tasted it.
I need to order one of those butt outfits. Are they OSFA? Or do they actually size them? Could I do stripes? I'd look hot in a mess like that with flattering horizontal stripes.

forever folding laundry said...

If loving Nutella is wrong I don't want to be right. Nutella + peanut butter + bread = all that is right with the world.

Wow. I love a pair of pants that make it look like my crotch drags down to my knees. Sweet!

~Keri

Kathy B! said...

Tee hee. Sometimes I feel like a hot mess when I leave the house. It's nice to know there are others who look worse. Much. Much. Worse.

Not you of course, peewee.

Others.

Lady of Perpetual Chaos said...

I'm wearing those super hott harlem pants RIGHT NOW! Are you saying I'm not stylish?!

Well, actually, my jeans and t-shirt feel incredibly stylish in comparison. Those bring a whole new meaning to the "does this make my butt look big" question!

NIKOL said...

I love commercials that say a product is "part of a nutritious breakfast" when what they really mean is "you can eat this along with a nutritious breakfast - that way you'll feel less guilty!"

Nutella and I have a long standing love affair. But I've never thought to put it on a croissant like Kelli suggested. That Kelli sounds like an enabler to me.

Kris said...

MC Hammer better be getting a commission off those clothes.

peewee said...

I know Nikol! I absolutely ran out for some croissants because that sounded like SUCH a good idea! Kelli IS an enabler. I'm thinking Nutella/banana/PB/Croissant sandwich. I might even open a cafe.

Lisa said...

I've never tried Nutella. Be smart, don't start?

I agreet those look like MC Hammer pants. Very tacky!

NIKOL said...

Nutella/banana/PB/Croissant sandwich, hmm? You deep fry that baby and I'm in!

Carin Davis said...

I feed my girls Nutella like any good mom should...especially on crepes with bananas, creme, caramel.... When are you coming back so you and Dede can make those again!?

p.s. I can't wait for the retreat!

peewee said...

Now Nikol is the enabler...Enabler above ALL enablers!