Wednesday, June 02, 2010

coffee talk

Ahhh. Those blissful hours when teen slave is asleep and I can just have my coffee and my recorded shows to watch. And I'm just gonna go ahead and say this now....Glee kinda sucked last night {ducking all the fists flying through the screen} There was just something so VERY disturbing about Will shaking his ass at Sue while singing "funk." VERY. DISTURBING. And I'm SO confused about the Jesse part. WHy did he turn into such a douche? It's ok though. How can you really follow the lady gaga episode with anything good? SO, I forgive you Ryan Murphy, for making me listen to Finn sing Beck.

Speaking of awkward....Yesterday after I taught class we were headed down the elevator to my car and it was me, teen slave, and...FABIO. For real. She didn't know what to do with herself. The look on her face was PRICELESS. He just kinda stood there smiling. I mean what DO you do when you're Fabio and you're in an elevator with people?? Which of course made me think wow...imagine poor Fabio on a first date! I mean, how do you even MEET that expectation of Fabio when you ARE Fabio?! You think he has to show up on a horse each and every time? Poor guy. What if he wants to take you to Olive Garden? I just don't think he can get away with that.

I also took teen slave to open her first bank acct. at my bank. And they said as we were sitting there, that for the referral, I would get a whopping $25. The Bank lady says this with the enthusiasm AS IF she just said $2,500. Teen Slave looks over at me and goes "You're WELCOME!" And no. She wasn't being sarcastic. I almost smacked her upside the head. But I held my cool and just said "yah. That's about what you cost me PER HOUR." Does she NOT understand how many more spin classes/colonics are in her future??? (thanks Nikol!!)

I also took her to register for her college classes. She was told she would have to take an english placement test. But she had already passed english 101 in her first year of school. SO she had to go to a different office and ask if she REALLY had to take that placement test. We wait in line. She approaches the guy behind the desk JUST like this.

GUY BEHIND DESK: How can I help you?
HER: Hi. I was just wondering why the hell I have to take a placement test for english when I already passed english.

Being that the guy behind the desk had tattoos on his eyelids he didn't even bat a tattooed eye when she said that. I, however was horrified. Looks like we have to work on some people skillz today. You know, for when she addresses people who AREN'T ex-cons on work-release.

Motherhood is very challenging. Are babies any easier???

Better enjoy my coffee before IT wakes and asks me what the hell is for breakfast.


Kristina P. said...

OK, I am going with mail order bride.

And how is Fabio's nose?

rychelle said...

being as young as she is, i'm surprised she even knew who fabio was.

Kris said...

Glee kind of sucked?! DID YOU NOT HEAR & SEE "GOOD VIBRATIONS"?!

Put the crack up, yo.

NIKOL said...

Glee did indeed suck last night, the Good Vibrations part notwithstanding. When Will said the phrase "Hump Day" to Sue, I think a little piece of me died. Ditto with the whole Teen Mother slow jam to Man's World.

If I were in the elevator with Fabio, I would totally want to work an "I Can't Believe it's Not Butter" joke into the conversation somewhere.

peewee said...

YAH! I was SO excited for Quinn's song and then it was the lamest thing.

bernthis said...

I worked out in the same gym as Fabio. Let's just say the men went nutty while all I could do is stare at his hair and wonder how he kept it so shiny

Dapoppins said...

followed you over from snuggie land, I mean Kristina P's...I want to stand in an elevator with Fabio. Is he tall or does he wear heels? And I love your flash back side bar. Real sleestacks rock.

DG at Diary of a Mad Bathroom said...

Fabio in an elevator? Epic!

VerDell Christiansen said...

Sister K, I had no idea you were so maternal. Matronly, I might have said... but this is a whole new side of you! You have so many sides.

Chocolate Covered Daydreams said...

Hilarious! She was able to get help after the way she talked to tattoo dude?

I've never watched Glee. Should I be curious?

Melanie J said...

I love my ten-year-old but I'm beginning to believe I might want to give him away during those teenage years.