Wednesday, April 01, 2009

Better than a snuggie!



Your relationship of late: fresh, fruity, and (sadly) rooty-tooty.

Your partner’s nocturnal emissions have you worried that the honeymoon is over. And great meals just keep amounting to a hill of beans.

Bring back the love with the Better Marriage Blanket.

The BMB’s activated carbon fabric layer lessens the blow of late-night bombings using technology that originated from government-issue chemical warfare suits. In other words, your Aunt Agnes’s bean-and-sausage soup has finally met its match.

Plus, it’s washable, dryable, and even flame retardant — for those nights when cabbage is on the menu.

Put one on the guest room bed and tell your family and friends. You may feel silly tooting your horn over a blanket, but don’t worry.

No one gives a poot about that.

Get one for my brother's wedding: CHECK.

And to my married readers: You're welcome.

7 comments:

rychelle said...

seriously. where do you find this stuff?

Lady of Perpetual Chaos said...

Yes, where DO you find it?

Debbie said...

Sounds perfect!

dede said...

you need one of those for your dogs!!

Unknown said...

P.

Thanks for visiting my blog, yours is hilarious!

Counselormama said...

Great, they just now invent this? I guess better late than never. Your new sis-in-law will thank you!

forever folding laundry said...

Wow. This is just - uh - wow.

I wonder if it comes wrapped in a brown paper bag so not even your mailman has to know you ordered one?

Your brother is going to love you!!

~Keri